Fostering Love & Logic in Your Home

By Katie Rasmussen

If I could take one piece of advice that was given to me and pass it along to every parent out there it would be that the language you choose can bring peace to your home or it can ignite control battles. By that I mean two sentences that essentially sound the same can have completely different affects/outcomes. Read these two examples; "Please sit down. We're going to eat now" and "we will eat as soon as you are seated." Does one sound better? Which do you think will have the more positive result? In the first sentence, "please" was used, and the parent was asking the child to do something politely. However, the first example is a directive, and when children are given directives they tend to challenge more, causing control battles to occur.
In the second sentence the parent is putting the desired action to be taken on the child, they know as soon as they sit down, they get to eat. This is the beauty of Love & Logic, an educational philosophy developed by Foster Cline, MD and Jim Fay, to teach children responsibility and independence in a peaceful, fearless manner.

When a statement is said like "clean your room so we can go shopping," a child will contemplate that and feel a little defensive because they are being told to do something. Whether it's a good or bad option, they still have to choose if they like what's being presented how they are going to respond. Another option would be to say something like "I am happy to take you chopping as soon as you clean your room." The child hears an option that sounds more positive because the word "happy" was used, and she is more inclined to get moving and clean that room.

Now play out that situation a bit and imagine the child starts cleaning, but gets distracted by some drawings they found. She decides to sit down and create more artwork, an hour goes by. The child remembers going shopping and now the store closes in 15 minutes. She says "Mom! We gotta go now, the store is closing!" Mom has a few options here, a triggered response might sound like, "I told you as soon as you clean your room we'd go, but your room isn't clean, is it?" When a kid hears those first 3 words of "I told you..." she flips into defensive mode and might start the "but, but, but" scheme, which could initiate a long battle with mom. A more successful approach for mom might be to say "I am happy to take you shopping when your room is clean, if the store is closed when your room is clean, we can go tomorrow." It's matter of fact, nothing changed from what she said the first time, and it puts the responsibility on the child. It should now be very clear that mom will be HAPPY to go shopping when the room is clean.

I encourage all parents to read Parenting With Love & Logic just to learn the buzz words and practice the language if for no other reason. Love & Logic can change your home and bring peace to a place where battles once existed.

Please check out http://www.loveandlogic.com to learn more.
Katie Rasmussen is a writer for http://www.fitmom3.com
She is a mother of 3 boys who struggled with weight and fitness and has found support through friends. After completing 4 marathons, 3 1/2 marathons, 2 1/2 Ironmans, 6 triathlons, and 1 century bike ride, Katie is committed to helping other moms believe in themselves and find the strength within to be a fit mom!
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Rare Book

By Gordon Petten

A rare book is an unusual, old book that is classified as valuable due to its unique qualities in content and structure. A collection of unique materials constitutes this kind of book since its contents may never be found elsewhere in archives or libraries. A book can be desirable to an individual private collector but may fail to appease a university or college. Many people currently engage in the activity of collecting rare books for monetary value. Nevertheless, there are agencies responsible for the preservation of unique collections of academic materials considered unique and exceptional. The resources include literature, scientific and exceptional academic materials. Such books are often transferred to secure places where readers can access them without taking copies with them for the sake of copyright protection.

The criteria of classifying a rare book is often the age. Different regions have customary traditions upon which a book is judged to appear. Experts recommend that it is important to assess the dates based on the relevance of the materials and their application in a specific period. For instance, nineteenth century material may not have appealed to students or readers a century ago. The trends change and contents of books undergo transformation as well, but the way in which a material of antiquity remains unique is the facts that are not prone to changes. Rare books have the basic facts that do not change even after a long period. The style of presentation makes a book qualify as either rare or obsolete. Readers usually perceive secondary and primary thoughts presented in written material differently. Consequently, the materials with comprehensive information on topical issues are classified as rare - for preservation, for use by future generations.

In an academic setting, the sole purpose of a rare book is to create a unique site for antiquated collections that enhance reference resources in an institution. This implies that such research materials support complex research for graduates and other faculty levels. It is a common expectation that reputable university libraries have archives with unique study materials for in-depth research based on particular books. The collections of such rare materials have information that was once extensively used by former faculty members. It is therefore important to ensure that an academic institution reserves rare books to allow students to gain deep knowledge from search materials. This can be achieved by rating a rare book according to its relevance and subjects it covers. Academicians have the responsibility of identifying rare materials within their areas of specialization in order to boost the reserves of rare books.

Generally, materials dating from early 1830s qualify as rare books for collection. However, many books dating before this period are equally significant. Many people classify rare or ancient books based on the introduction of printing in particular geographic areas. There is an increasing concern for the publications made in the 19th century, to maintain the original catalogues and original binding to make them valuable for research. Rare resources convey a history of thoughts transmitted to posterity.
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Dreaming About Genie

By Sarah Todd

Please note: the subject matter of Djinn is very large, and very detailed. I am only touching of the very basics of these fascinating and interesting creatures.

Islamic mythology tells us Djinn are fiery spirits, originating in pre-Islam Middle Eastern folklore. The Djinn lived on earth long before man, and were created from smokeless fire; unlike man who is made from earth. Belief in Djinn was so strong the creatures were incorporated into the Islamic faith. Although they are destructive creatures, Djinn can sometimes be useful to human beings. Djinn do not like daylight, and are believed to cause insanity and disease.
Contrary to many evil beings, Djinn have free will, and may even be redeemed through the Faith. Many Djinn harbour malicious feelings towards humans, believing themselves to be far superior than man.

Djinn, like their human counterparts, have organised societies and lifestyles, and interact within these the same way as human societies. They form relationships, raise families, eat food and die. Their longevity exceeds man's, and like humans they have the ability to be good or bad. Although they can see humans we are unable to see them, unless by accident or if the Djinn chooses to be seen. The Qur'an states Muhammad was a prophet to both "humanity and the Djinn",

There are four types of Djinn:

Ghul - a mischievous shape-shifter associated with graveyards and cemeteries, Ghuls have a particular affinity to the hyena, their favourite metamorphosis. A Ghul consumes the dead, robs graves and preys on children. It also lures travellers into the desert wastelands to kill and devour them. The English word "ghoul" owes its origins to this name.

Sila - these Djinns can take on any shape they choose, and are very difficult to distinguish from human beings. They're extremely intelligent.

Ifrit - an arrogant spirit, Ifrits resent mankind's ability to control them through magic, because they were around long before man. The resentment makes them difficult to work with, and their bad attitude means they try very hard to undermine any orders received from their masters. An Ifrit may reveal him/herself as an individual of incredible beauty and superhuman strength.

Marid - the most powerful Djinns, with the arrogance and pride so typical of these creatures. Also known as "blue djinn" because their skin is either blue or green, a Marid's hair always looks wet and wavy - as though swimming. This type of Djinn will grant a human's wish, but at a price - perhaps a battle, imprisonment or various rituals designed to appease the Marid. A bit of flattery goes a long way!

The main Djinn is Iblis. Created by Allah, Iblis was forbidden from Allah's presence when he refused to honour the creation of the first man, Adam - confirmation of Djinn's inferiority complex at the supposed usurpation of their position as Allah's first and best creation. After encouraging Adam and Eve to eat the forbidden fruit Allah cast him out, condemning him to live in Hell - Jarhannam - for eternity. Exhibiting typical Djinn behaviour Iblis told Allah he wanted mankind to fail, and to spend eternity with him in Jarhannam. To test the faith of both Man and the Djinn, Allah allowed Iblis to roam freely on Earth, doing his best to make people commit sins. While it may seem that Iblis the Djinn is to Islam what Satan is to Christianity, the Qur'an says Iblis is not Allah's enemy. All deeds - both good and bad - come from Allah, who is the only One who can save humanity from both the evils of His universe and that of His creations. Iblis was created by Allah, who is supreme over all His creations. Iblis' enemy is Man, which is why he tries to prevent human beings from obeying Allah. The similarity between the Islamic and Christian faiths is that universal evil in every man's personal life is usually experienced because of one being - Satan or Iblis.

It's generally accepted that the Western ideal of the Genie is based on the tale of Aladdin in "The Book of 1001 Nights", which features a Genie living in an oil lamp. He would be freed when someone polished the lamp, and in return would grant his liberator three wishes. This story has taken several variations; one of the most common is the results of carelessly worded wishes. This is probably best illustrated by WW Jacobs' classic "The Monkey's Paw", wherein the owner of the paw will be granted three wishes... at a price.

Caution - spoiler ahead!!! Mr White was cautioned about the three wishes when he receives the cursed paw, but he makes what he feels is an innocent request when he asks for a small sum of money. His wish is granted, and he receives the exact sum of money - as an insurance payment when his son dies in an accident at work. Naturally Mr and Mrs White's grief is dreadful, and a second wish to bring their son back appears to have been answered when, some time after making the wish, a knocking is heard at the door. As his wife rushes down to open the door Mr White realises the delay must mean his son had to travel from the cemetery back home, and is probably in the same condition as he was at the morgue. Fearing the terrible sight of his son, who was only identifiable by his clothes, Mr White makes a final wish. The reader never learns the exact details of the wish, but when we read of his wife's cry of disappointment and the empty street outside their house our imaginations can complete the story. End of spoiler.

Here are some examples of Djinn in literature:

Christopher Moore' "Practical Demonkeeping" describes the origins of Djinn, the creation of man and God's relationship with both parties.

Rudyard Kipling's "Just So Stories" contains a tale about "the Djinn in Charge of All Deserts", who gives a lazy camel his hump.

Tim Power's "Declare" places Djinn in a modern cold war, giving them a home on Mount Ararat which is discovered by a British secret serviceman.

C S Lewis' classic "The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe" features Mr Beaver identifying Jadis, the White Witch, as having giantess and Djinn origins.

P B Kerr's "Children of the Lamp" deals with the adventures of twins Phillipa and John Gault, who have to use their powers to defeat evil Djinn forces.

Diana Wynne Jones' "Castle in the Air" tells of carpet salesman's Abdullah's dealings with a magic carpet, his love for the beautiful Princess Flower-in-the-Night and various Djinn who interfere in his life.

In conclusion it seems the Genie/Djinn a great character for a fantasy writer, and the surrounding mythology and connotations surrounding this being means it can be placed in many situations. "The Monkey's Paw" story warns us to be careful what we wish for, and to consider the price and consequences of those wishes. While the Djinn will grant those wishes the greed or ignorance of its master may cause pain, suffering or even death to innocent people or those close to the wisher.

The writer was born in Africa, and lived there for the first 38 years of her life. She worked in the world of public relations for over five years, running her own PR company and dealing extensively with the world of journalism and the print media. She is an author on http://www.Writing.Com, a site for Writers. Her blog can be visited at: http://www.writing.com/authors/zwisis/blog
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Book Review - No Innocent Bystanders

By Joel Hirschhorn

It is never easy to communicate wisdom. Even more difficult to do so in an engaging way that makes it very, very easy to read and understand. Mickey Z. has accomplished this difficult task in his new book No Innocent Bystanders. This book is designed to reach deep into a person's consciousness, pierce normal psychological defenses, and overcome a lifetime of facile rationalizations. This is a book to inspire a revolution spirit in Americans, the kind needed to achieve what Thomas Jefferson had the wisdom to say our nation would need: a revolution every generation or so.

Throughout the book are wisdom-droppings that readers need to hold onto for a few minutes before moving on. One of my favorite examples: "Protesting can be a bonding experience but it rarely achieves its intended goal." I liked this because a central theme of the book is that so many people have found ways to justify their lifestyle and even their political independence, but that, for the most part, are just empty beliefs and actions that accomplish next to nothing.
Along that line of thought here is a terrific tongue-in-cheek list that could qualify for the David Letterman show:

Top Ten Ways to Change the World

1. Wear a "Free Tibet" t-shirt
2. Switch to recycled toilet paper
3. Watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert
4. Adopt a Third World orphan
5. Start a discussion about Africa
6. Eat free range chicken
7. Drive a hybrid SUV
8. Subscribe to The Nation
9. Chant for peace in your yoga class
10. Vote Democrat

Mickey Z. has written consistently in ways that appeal to dissidents, but also sees the ugly truth about most of us, namely that "this is all about dissidents finally blaming everyone who deserves blame (including ourselves)." Which makes me believe that this book would make a wonderful gift to anyone who thinks of themselves as a political dissident, and even more so for any younger person, still in school or college, that thinks they see Truth in the world around them.
One recurring theme that I particularly liked was the view that it has become far too easy for Americans to blame those in power, like George W. Bush, but that ultimately each and every one of us must take responsibility. Listen to Mickey Z.: "Their participation in the twoparty farce and their acceptance of lesser evilism, however, are not seen as the problem by those in the know. It's all Bush's fault. ...There are no innocent bystanders when our money and/or rhetoric support the world's most powerful military and the corporate status quo. But if we just keep telling ourselves it's all Bush's fault, we can sleep better-our innocence wrapped around us like a big white SUV."
In other words, there really are No Innocent Bystanders. This easy-to-read and conscience-raising book is now available at Amazon.com [http://uleitei.notlong.com ] Take responsibility. Get it.
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Randy Pausch and His Last Lecture Will Live on For Generations

By Jason Greiner

Just a few years ago, outside of his classes the halls of Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh (and of course a few other select places) nobody really knew Randy Pausch.

As the story played out, Pausch was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer in September of 2006. After all was said and done, medical experts gave him little more than a year to live. Obviously, he outlived expectations.

When people get this type of news, they often approach the time they have left with a lot of contemplation, reflection and preparation. Some use the time to visit exotic lands. Others use these days with a focus on spiritual salvation. And, yet others arrange their finances so as to assure the future security of their spouse and children. But as one television promo put it, Pausch used his time to "change the world."

A book he co-wrote, "The Last Lecture," and his actual last lecture at CMU on September 18, 2007, where simply the final touches on the life of an extraordinary man and thinker.

In addition to teaching his three children about life, he taught countless others about the importance of taking risks, always being truthful and never giving up on our childhood dreams. One of his most noted philosophies is that the "brick walls" along our path of life are not there to keep us out but rather show us how bad we really want to achieve.

Pausch's last lecture was recorded and has been viewed by millions on the Internet and in segments on various television programs. The Electronic Arts company, who has been collaborating with CMU of late, will honor his name by creating a memorial scholarship fund for women in computer science, a group he was known for mentoring. And countless cancer patients and individuals with other terrible conditions have acknowledged him as a source of inspiration for them to stay strong.

Pausch may have only had the chance to walk the earth for a far too short 47 years. But, his lessons and memory will likely reside in the hearts and on the minds of several generations to come.

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Gus Hansen Finally Writes a Poker Book

By Marty Smith

One of the most notable sporting and entertainment figures of this decade has always been somewhat aloof to the poker market upswing while at the same time being the source of its epicenter. Gus never really bothered with marketing himself or taking advantage of his popularity. He just loves to play, and challenge himself, and yes... gamble. If you know anything about Gus Hansen, it's that he loves to gamble. But in this new book, you learn a lot more about how the math of Gus Hansen actually explains away that gambling moniker and theorem.

This book is delightfully insightful and forthright. Gus has really opened up here and goes through every contentious hand he plays at the 2007 Aussie Millions, where he dominated the final table and kick-slapped an internet newcomer named Jimmy Fricke heads up to seal the deal. In showing how he strategizes right through that tournament he creates sincere value that we amateur players may have never before been exposed to because players like Gus are just so rare.

If you've ever seen some of the hands from this tournament on youtube, you will see that Gus was actually using a personal recording device and whispering into a mic throughout the Aussie Millions Tournament. You have to wonder if it was a self check system for Gus, or if he had actually planned to use the information for this book ahead of time.

Nonetheless he was definitely in a good position to analyze the hands for this book as he could easily review the chips counts, stacks, position and all the other important tournament factors. You get his detailed insight into the thought processes of one of the best tourney players in the world, while also learning about the different strategies of playing a full table and playing short-handed, and how important aggression is part of Gus Hansen's game.

Hansen's book should be read after Harrington's because you have two very different styles, but one could argue that Hansen is more successful than Harrington. This is more a less a personal slant as to what style you can play effectively where one style is no better than the other. Gus writes quite blatantly that most poker books are too theoretical and assert play that far too tight for tournaments.

The practical style poker books seems to carry more value as they are just that much easier to read, think about, and then take to the table yourself, trying to recognize similar situations you may have just soaked in. Gus Hansen's book is all about this, and it makes it easily worth every cent.

There were a lot of tournament structure and strategy notes that Gus explained in this book too, as he made a habit of recapping the day's events, setting up for the day ahead, analyzing blinds changes and payout structures, and really analyzing his opponents quite frequently as the tournament changed.

Surely an advanced poker this is, from one of the world's most gifted players.
Marty Smith has video reviews all the top poker books and produces tournament strategy videos that are free just for signing up.
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